BECOME THE MAN WOMEN WANT
4th of August 2014

What Guys Need To Know About College (Ages 18-22)

Introduction:

College is when the world starts to open up for most men, and there’s a lot you can do there to make yourself more attractive and increase your ability to have relationships with women. The main thing that you can change is your relative social status, and it’s not hard to do. Tucker and Dr. Miller tell you exactly how to do that, along with explaining how to pick your classes to increase your mating opportunities, and how to find women that you’ll have things in common with. The pair also share some of their funnier stories about their own mistakes with women from their college days.

Podcast:


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Key takeaways:

  • College age is when mating effort peaks. Biologically, it’s when men are programmed to devote more time and energy to acquiring mates than at any other point in their lives. Testosterone peaks at about 18-19 as well.
  • There are two ways to deal with this: masturbate a lot, and have lots of sex. This is normal and natural.
  • And if you want to have a relationship, that’s totally normal as well – in fact, the majority of college guys want to be in relationships.
  • Girls often say nice things to each other that they don’t mean. That’s how they demonstrate friendship. Guys are the opposite – they say horrible things to each other that they don’t mean, but the fact that you can break each other’s balls and they know you’re kidding and they’re fine with it, that’s how guys show affection for each other.
  • College is much better than high school in terms of your social status, because it’s a lot more fluid and dynamic in college, as opposed to high school where your place on the totem pole is fairly fixed.
  • Whatever hobbies you’re into, join the clubs that do those things. If they don’t exist, start them.
  • And remember, there are good and bad clubs to join if you want to meet women. Do NOT do what Geoff did and join the Men’s Feminist Union.
  • Generally speaking, liberally-minded groups will contain people who are liberally-minded sexually as well as politically. Their membership of the group (and in fact any membership of any group) is usually a signalling mechanism.
  • You don’t have to try and be the cool guy on campus. Instead what you need to do is join the groups you want to join, or do the things that you like doing, and be the cool guy doing that thing. That means showing up, doing whatever work is required, demonstrating your intelligence, and then you can meet girls through that group.
  • As an example, if you’re in Chemistry class, then start a study group and be the group leader. Instantly you’ve created a mini-hierarchy in which you are the leader, so right away you’re more attractive.
  • It’s not necessarily a good idea to go straight from high school to college. If you’re a 19 year old freshman ( as opposed to 17 or 18) you’re a lot more mature and advanced. It’s a big head start, so take a year off and travel (or work) if you can.
  • The female to male sex ratio (the mating market) is a huge predictor of success. If there are more women than men, that gives you a huge advantage. You can engineer this in your favor by going to colleges with a good female-male ratio, or by taking classes and joining groups that have a good female-male ratio (e.g. Psych classes, education, nursing). This is one of the reasons Tucker did so much better in law school than in undergrad.
  • Also, don’t get tunnel vision and just focus on other students – you can hook up with grad students, admin staff, secretaries, service workers etc.
  • You will fuck up and fail. A lot. Everyone does. Don’t worry about it.
  • There is no upside to going around and bragging about all the girls you sleep with. If you do, you’re advertising to every other woman that if she has sex with you, everyone will know. Most women aren’t into that.
  • The secret to getting laid in college is to treat women like people, not just things to fuck.

Links from this episode

Podcast Audio Transcription:

Tucker:
Alright, so on the last Mating Grounds podcast; we covered life stages of mating. What you should expect as a guy at certain stages: puberty, high school, and then we were gonna make one episode cover puberty, high school, college, and post-college, and we realized pretty quickly that this was gonna take way more than one episode. We had too many stories, too many—

Geoff:
Too many embarrassing stories.

Tucker:
Right. Too many ridiculous, embarrassing stories and there’s just too many details, I think, to cover. So, in this episode, we’re gonna try and just cover college. What you can expect in college and what ways to sort of avoid problems and kind of do things better. So, generally speaking, college is – this is in America, college is about 18 to 22. Why don’t you, Dr. Miller, before we get into the more social and dating aspects of college, talk a little bit about biologically and mentally, where are guys in the 18 to 22 stage? We kind of talked about high school, about how they’re way, way behind girls and that a lot of the frontal lobes haven’t developed. They haven’t really developed empathy. They haven’t developed a lot of higher-order thought. And most guys peak long after high school, emotionally, intellectually, physically, right? So, talk about that with regards to college.

Geoff:
College age is when mating effort peaks. I mean, biologically, that’s when guys are programed to devote more energy, time, effort and risk to acquiring female mates than any other point in their life. It absolutely dominates their thinking, their hormones, their motivational system. But, it’s tough, ‘cause in modern society, that’s also the period when you are supposed to be working the very, very hardest to make yourself economically useful to society by learning useful stuff. So, there’s a real fundamental tension. If you go to college, your whole limbic system, your whole motivational brain system is sort of all about mating, but your neocortex, your thinking system, is like, “I have to buckle down. I have to do well. I have to prepare myself for grad school or a good job,” and that’s a big tension. I think we’ll talk a little bit about how you should view college as not just economic preparation for life, but also it’s a mating market in itself. In fact, it’s kind of designed that way.

Tucker:
Right. So, let’s just talk just for a second biologically. So, look, guys, what Dr. Miller just said is that when you’re in college, you’re gonna be really fucking horny all the time. Like, all that stuff he was talking about about peak mating effort, etc., your testosterone peaks, usually, at about eighteen or nineteen. There’s sort of a colloquial saying in sex research that men peak sexually at about eighteen and women peak sexually at about thirty. Which is kind of funny, because one of the best relationships I ever had in my life, and it was mainly sexual, but I was about twenty and it was a woman who was, like, thirty-one or thirty-two. It was like a summer, and it was like, yeah…We wanted to fuck about the same amount. It was, like, perfect. And she was really experienced and so it was really kind of nice for me because she didn’t have all the hang-ups or anxieties or issues that younger girls had, and she was patient enough to be like, alright. She overlooked a lot of my ridiculous flaws as a 19- or 20-year-old because I could fuck ten times more than any guy her age, or at least the guys that she was seeing. Anyway, so fully understand that if you are so horny it’s hard for you to think about things other than women or vagina or sex or masturbation or whatever, that’s normal. That’s super normal. It’s super okay. I dealt with that. I know in college, there’s two ways I dealt with that. One was to masturbate a lot, and two was to try and hook up with a lot of women. I know it sounds a little bit daft and obvious, but there are a lot of guys who, I think, go through this and they don’t understand that that’s normal and that’s okay.

Geoff:
Yeah. I mean, this is absolutely kind of ass-backwards, but if you don’t take care of yourself sexually, your grades will suffer.

Tucker:
‘Cause you can’t think in class!

Geoff:
Yeah. And this is also, you know…it’s not just the peak in mating effort. It’s also the peak age at which men do all the other stuff that involves sexual competition, right? It’s also the peak of men killing other men. It’s when men become soldiers if they don’t go to college. It’s when guys get in fights, so everything animalistic that guys do involving mating, both trying to attract females and compete with other males. It’s peaking right at the time when society is saying study 60 hours a week.

Tucker:
Right. Exactly. So, let me also make another point. I know I’ve made this point multiple times. I’m gonna make it again. If you are eighteen and you don’t feel highly sexual and you just want a girlfriend, that’s fine. We’re not telling you that you have to be a sexual monster at nineteen and want to fuck every second of every day. Of course not. We’re saying if you are, don’t feel bad. That’s super normal. At the same time, it’s not uncommon at all to have a very – I don’t want to say normal sex drive, but something less than a “baboon in heat” sex drive and to just want a girlfriend and to have a relationship. Not only is that normal, but believe it or not, most studies indicate – in fact, I just read one yesterday when I was putting a Check This Out up on Mating Grounds – I think 63% of college guys would prefer a relationship over a series of hookups. 85% of girls prefer that, right? So, guys, if you prefer that, you’re in the majority of college guys. Your friends might not admit it. You might go to a college that has a very predominant hookup culture, where it’s like no one dates and whatever. If you don’t like that, that’s okay, too. Either one is okay. Both are normal. Both are okay. Both are appropriate, depending on who you are and what you want at that stage of your life.

Geoff:
Yeah. Figure out what works for you and don’t…you know, there’s a huge amount of peer pressure. You don’t need to take it seriously. If you want a girlfriend, get a girlfriend.

Tucker:
Either way. Like, you can be going to some stereotypical Catholic college or a Mormon school, like BYU where it’s like, “Oh, you can’t hook up. You have to shack up and date someone and marry them,” and whatever, and you just want to fuck? To hell with those people. Fuck! That’s fine. Have a bunch of short-term relationships. Hook up all you want. If you’re at the other side and you’re going to, like, some SEC school and you’re in a fraternity and all your fucking frat brothers make fun of you if you are anything less than obnoxiously rude to a girl and you really want a girlfriend, dude, fuck those guys. And I mean that metaphorically, not literally. I mean, like, to hell with them. There’s nothing wrong with finding a girl and dating her. Now, obviously, you’re gonna be made fun of a little bit, but that’s fine. Guys, let me explain something else that a lot of young guys don’t understand. I think this is really true in college. Women, a lot of times, say nice things to each other and don’t mean it and that’s how they express their friendship. I don’t mean that in a bad way. It’s just…a lot of women, that’s sort of the way that they’re socially trained. Guys say terrible things to each other and don’t mean it, and that’s how they express their affection, right? So, if you’ve been listening to this podcast, you probably heard me a hundred times bust on Professor Miller or call him Brillo Brain or whatever, some goofy nonsense. The fact that you can tease someone or you can say something awful and they know you’re kidding and they’re cool with it, that’s actually an affirmation of friendship and closeness in guys. Right?

Geoff:
Yeah, absolutely. Like, I misinterpreted this quite a bit in college. I worked in the on campus grocery store, cashier, and in the first week, some of the senior guys…Yeah, they kind of locked me in the beer cooler refrigerator place for, like, an hour. Right? And I was kind of knocking on the door, like, “Hey, can I get out?” And actually, they kind of wanted to be friends and they were kind of like, “Hey, do you want to go out for beer after work?” “Fuck you! You locked me in the cooler! No! That’s a sign of being my enemy.” And I just didn’t get that it was kind of playful teasing.

Tucker:
Then it probably got worse after that for you.

Geoff:
Yeah. Then, like, the harder they teased, the more they wanted to hang out, and I just didn’t get it.

Tucker:
Yeah. I can totally see that. I can totally see you at nineteen, like, coming out of the beer freezer, like, throwing your fists around all upset and the dudes looking at you like, “What are you doing? Fucking nerd, I’ll knock you out.” Totally. That is something that a lot of guys don’t get. I know I can’t tell you how many times in my life I’ll be fucking with someone and teasing in a fun way and they don’t realize they’re in on the joke. They think they’re the butt of the joke, and they get really pissed off at me. And then of course, that just makes me fuck with them more, ‘cause that’s also funny in a different way, when someone gets really angry about something that there’s no reason to be angry about. That’s hilarious.

Geoff:
Well, that’s how guys test each other’s confidence. Basically, if you can take the joke and you can deal with the teasing and come back with more teasing, then you’re a confident, reliable, high value guy. If you can’t take the teasing, then you kind of just wash out and you’re not of interest.

Tucker:
Right. Well, it just means you’re not very emotionally resilient. You’re not very socially intelligent. Now, of course, it can go too far, especially in college. Guys can go way too far and take turns joking and being a dick, which I’ve done plenty of times, especially in college. So, we should probably do a whole podcast on male-male social interaction, like friendship interaction. But all this is very relevant for college, because what’s gonna happen is you’re gonna get to college at about eighteen and you are coming out a social environment where you had, basically, a set hierarchical role, so we talked about this in the last podcast. Either you were low man on the totem pole and it was awful, you were one of the cool guys at your school and it was awesome, or you were the 80% of people who fall in between and probably felt like it was terrible and no one else looked at you as bad as you thought it was for you. Then, you’re gonna get to college and you’re gonna be able to not only – I don’t want to say invent a new persona, but you get to decide where you fit in the school. College is very similar to high school, but it’s also very different. It very much is an in-between stage between the real world and high school. In the real world, social hierarchies are completely dependent on context and are super fluid and can literally change hour-to-hour, even, depending on where you are and who you are around, right? High school doesn’t really change like that, ‘cause you’re around the same people all the time. College is sort of in between. You can have one sort of status level in your dorms, a different status level in groups you’re in, and then a totally different status level in classes or with professors or whatever. And they can be very fluid and they can change and they can also not impact each other that much. You know?

Geoff:
Yes. It’s all compartmentalized and you can actually do little experiments and play around with your identity and your interests and try different kind of social tactics even in different classes. I mean, I was in classes where I was kind of the top of the totem pole ‘cause I knew the content and I made contributions in seminar, and then others where I was just kind of lost and nobody knew me. That’s okay. You have to kind of get comfortable with your status fluctuating in these different contexts.

Tucker:
Right. So, don’t look at college as, “Oh, man, this is my chance to reinvent myself! I’m gonna be cool here!” And you look at it as, like, this one big all-or-nothing thing. If you took our advice from the last podcast if you’re in high school and you readjusted and you kind of looked at various groups and thought about your status as very context-dependent and found better contexts for yourself in high school, apply that in college, just apply it more. So, now in college. Let’s say you get to college. Whatever you’re into, there’s probably gonna be groups that already exist. I would absolutely join them. If the groups don’t exist, I would absolutely start the groups, because then, like Dr. Miller said in the last podcast, French Club sucks but being President of the French Club is great for meeting the hot girls in French Club. So, French Club in college, but what there are is all these social groups or altruistic groups or philanthropic groups or things like that. By the way, here’s a really cool life pro-tip about college. So, my buddy and I…Almost every college is like this. Any student can start a group and as long as a group is open to everyone – even if it’s College Republicans or whatever – then you can usually get funding from the student committee whatever thing, right? It’s a huge pain in the ass. It’s ridiculous, because student government is always the most preposterous shit ever because it’s people with no power exercising the tiniest little power they have. Just expect that when you go in. But, if you play the game right, you can usually get money for parties. Then you throw these amazing parties and everyone’s like, “Wow, this guy’s so cool. He has all these cool parties.” Right? My buddy and I figured this out our freshman year at the University of Chicago, and we created a group call Ditka. Like, Mike Ditka, like the fucking football coach. It was called Ditka. And you had to write, like, a constitution for your student group if you were in Chicago. So, we wrote this elaborate, preposterous constitution that was, like, about how we worshipped Ditka as a god and we recognize the light from his illuminating uniform shines down and shows us the way through life. All this nonsense, right? It was fucking hilarious. Then, we ended up getting, like, $200 from them to throw a party, right? For our first semester. We basically bought as much meat as we could, and we rented a grill and we put it in the middle of the quad and grilled meat at lunchtime, like, on a Thursday. And we took pictures of it, and all these people came out. It was mainly, like, administrators, whatever. We had a successful event. Then, we went back the next semester and instead of $200, they gave us $2,000. Every semester after that, we got between two and four thousand dollars as our budget for Ditka, and we had everyone who came out and got meat sign up, so we had 500 people in our group. So we could go back and be like, “Oh, we have all these members. You have to give us money.” We basically had the school paying for – they wouldn’t pay for beer. So, we figured this trick out where we would go to Costco and we bought all this beer and then just have the credit card receipt that only has the amount on it and turn that in. They’d be like, “Oh, it has to be itemized!” We’d be like, “Oh, no, we lost it! We’re just irresponsible college students.” Dude, it was amazing! We got the school to buy us beer and meat. Every semester, we had at least two functions. Of course, they were “open to everyone.” We only invited our friends and girls, but anyone could come, so if they came out, it was like fine, no problem. Thousands of dollars. We were so fucking cool. Everyone thought we had the coolest thing ever. All we did was snake the school out of money for beer and meat. That’s college, guys. That’s college.

Geoff:
And that’s entrepreneurship.

Tucker:
Yes. Entrepreneurship, that’s social intelligence, that’s displaying all kinds of attractive things to women. Some large percentage of girls that I slept with in college I slept with because they met me at Ditka parties. It was amazing. We had so much fun at those things.

Geoff:
And then there’s other clubs that are probably not worth joining, like I quickly realized at Columbia, if you join the Men’s Feminist Union, this is not a good way to meet girls.

Tucker:
Talk about this a lot, ‘cause you’ve told me about this. This is good.

Geoff:
This is basically, like…okay, guys, back in the early, mid-eighties, kind of just sitting around sexually shaming each other about their beta-male or gamma-male status.

Tucker:
“You didn’t get written consent during sex that you could continue? You’re a terrible person!”

Geoff:
And we would read, like, Simone de Beauvoir and discuss it very earnestly, but I did drop out after, like, two or three meetings.

Tucker:
Okay. Thank god. I was gonna have to find someone else to partner with on this shit.

Geoff:
Yeah. And then I quickly realized, yeah, you can join other interest groups that actually have a higher proportion of women and you can also figure out which groups the women are…In college, a woman’s political orientation is a very good clue to her mating strategy. So, conservative women who want long-term boyfriends tend to join politically conservative groups. Women who are a little bit more into short-term mating and hooking up tend to join, on average, more politically liberal groups. Libertarian groups, whatever.

Tucker:
The pro-choice groups? Those are good for fucking. I’m kind of kidding, but I’m kind of not.

Geoff:
A girlfriend invited me to some pro-choice rally where we were, like, picketing the Catholics who were picketing the local Planned Parenthood and…So, yeah, the politically liberal groups tend to be there partly so that people with liberal attitudes generally, not just politically but sexually, kind of meet each other. This is a major reason for springtime campus protest season. My junior year, we had six months of anti-apartheid protests at Columbia that eventually got the university to divest and people occupied the administrative buildings and they were outside my dorm every fucking night, playing the same Free Nelson Mandela song. It was like a big Dionesian mating ritual. At the time, I kind of misunderstood it as, “Why are all these rich, white kids protesting an apartheid 6,000 miles away?” Well, actually, it’s mostly, of course, to meet other people with likeminded interests.

Tucker:
And it’s to signal how much they care about that. In their minds, signaling caring about apartheid raises their status, puts them in an elite group. You guys, go back and listen to the signaling podcast, that episode. Signaling is so – you can think of almost everything human beings do as signaling and 80% of the time, 90% of the time, you’re gonna be right. Instead of asking yourself, “What’s the logical reason this person is protesting?” Anything, pro-choice, pro-life, I don’t care, think about it in terms of signaling. What are they signaling to themselves about themselves and what are they signaling to the world about themselves? And why are they signaling it?

Geoff:
In fact, we could even include a link to my short little essay, Political Peacocks. It was exactly about moralistic signaling in college at these kinds of rallies.

Tucker:
So, that link will be on TheMatingGrounds.com on the podcast page for this one. Alright, so let’s talk…generally speaking, in college, how can guys be successful? I think it’s very similar to high school, but you have way more range and way more options, right? So, generally speaking, high school and college, the two things that are most attractive to women are still high status. So, in the next podcast we’re gonna talk about young adulthood and adulthood and that’s when being a great partner and a great father really start to matter, those values really start to compete with and even outweigh high status for a lot of women. But, high school and college, you’re still looking at high status, negotiating status hierarchies, to be the most attractive guy possible. Now, what’s cool about college is there are so many status hierarchies now. Don’t worry about being the cool man on campus. That doesn’t matter. There’s almost no such thing. Now, what you want to do is be the cool guy in whatever it is you do. And I don’t mean cool like, “Oh, I’m the fucking Fonz,” or whatever bullshit like that. We just talked about it. If you really are pro-choice…Don’t be the fucking guy who goes to the pro-choice meeting just to get laid because you think those girls have all had abortions. That’s so fucking lame. But, if you actually believe that – or pro-life, either one, I don’t really care – if you actually believe either of those, that’s fine. That’s cool. Then, when you go to the group, do a good job, say intelligent things, work hard, and meet women. That’s a great place to meet women who you know have at least one thing in common with you and probably have multiple things, because usually if people are protesting about something, that’s a signal of their worldview and worldviews usually align, right? ‘Cause you’re basically like an ape joining a tribe, is what people are doing. If you don’t get that, we’ll probably have a whole podcast about status hierarchies and what that really means, but that’s kind of a deep, intricate issue. Anyway, the point is, it doesn’t have to be protest stuff. It can be anything. You really like Chemistry, form a Chemistry study group and the fact that you formed it out of your class…You don’t have to be in charge. You don’t have to be the asshole that’s like, “Oh, you can’t say this.” No. You’re just the guy who formed it. You organize it. Immediately, if it’s you and three guys and four girls in that study group, immediately you’re the most attractive dude or you have the potential to be ‘cause you’re the guy who formed it. You’re the leader. You’re emailing people. You’re responsible. Oh, that’s cool, so you’ve created this mini-status hierarchy within a class that kind of has…I mean, a Chemistry class basically does not have status hierarchies, ‘cause who cares about anyone’s grades, whatever, right? Within that class, you have your own little status group and as long as you aren’t a fucking idiot, as long as you can actually perform the simple functions of a group leader, you’re 10 – 20% more attractive than you would’ve been before, which is usually more than enough for a girl who otherwise finds you attractive to be like, “Yeah. Let’s pursue something with this guy.” What are some other specific things you can think of that guys can do in college?

Geoff:
I mean, college, in a sense, is easy if you put yourself in the right situations. So, a lot of your mating success is simply things like…We’ve already kind of mentioned gap year ideas. We’ll do more on that later. But, going to college at the right age, not necessarily straight out of high school. That puts you immediately in a higher mate value situation.

Tucker:
The difference between 19- and 18-year-olds is huge. And so if you’re a 19-year-old freshman, you’re not old. You’re just mature and advanced. You’re got a big head start.

Geoff:
Then choosing the right university for you. Most guys go purely on US News and World Report rankings or some place their parents have heard of or whatever’s close. You’re allowed to choose a university based on things like what’s the sex ratio there? Like, when I went to Columbia University, I honestly had no idea when I showed up that it had been an all-male campus until the year I went and that it went co-ed the year I arrived. So suddenly, instead of 100% male, it was like…55% male, 45% female. And there was Barnard across the street that was all female. So, suddenly, what we call the operational sex ratio, the sex ratio of people in the mating market was, like, literally two girls for every guy.

Tucker:
Let’s go ahead – we’re doing to do a whole podcast on mating markets. Let’s do a really quick – ‘cause most guys don’t know what you’re talking about. So, explain, like…one minute. What is the mating market and why does it matter?

Geoff:
So, when I arrived at Columbia, all the senior guys were, like…

Tucker:
No, no, no. Not about Columbia. What is a mating market?

Geoff:
A mating market is a group of men and women who are available and single and trying to meet each other. They’re each trying to follow a mating strategy that they prefer. On average, typically, males want a little bit of a shorter term set of relationships. On average, women want a little bit longer term. So, there’s a bargaining, negotiation process that happens. If there are not enough guys to go around, the women have to adopt mating strategies that fit what the guys want. The guys have more bargaining power in that situation. The women have less if the guys are the scarce commodity. It’s just supply and demand. On the other hand, if there’s a shortage of women, then they can be super choosey and they can impose their preferred agenda on the guys, and if that happens to be longer term mating, the guys have to be willing to commit and act like good boyfriends and don’t cheat and they have to do, basically, what the women want. So, the sex ratio of the place you go is absolutely crucial for determining the sexual norms and expectations on a campus.

Tucker:
Okay. So, if you got all that, that’s great. If you are a little bit of a retard and didn’t follow this, let me explain it really simply. You want to be places where there are more women than men because even if every dude pairs up, there’s gonna be girls left over for you.

Geoff:
And those girls will be competing for your attention.

Tucker:
Yes. It’s that simple. And if you’ve ever been anywhere, anywhere in any group where it’s, like, somehow there’s three guys and seven girls, have you not noticed how much more attention you get from girls? Where if it’s seven guys and three girls, you don’t get any attention? That’s what a mating market is, in the most simplistic terms possible. So, what Dr. Miller was talking about is actually a brilliant fucking strategy that I had never really thought about before we really started diving into this material. I thought about it colloquially, but not from a scientific perspective. You should very much choose where to go to school based on how many men are there vs. how many women. I’ll give you a great example of why this matters in my life. For undergrad, I made the horrific mistake of going to the University of Chicago, and I picked my school for intellectual reasons. It is, if not the best, one of the best undergrad experiences in the country in terms of intellectual difficulty and sort of challenge. I had Nobel Laureate professors and all that sort of high status bullshit, right? But it’s also about 60% guys, 40% girls and most of the girls there, they’re not just smart. They’re crazy outlier smart girls. They’re, like, the nerdy chess club socially anxious weird girls. There were not many attractive girls there, right? So, it was kind of a fucking mating market disaster for me. Then, I went to law school. Law school’s basically…I don’t know. Grad schools, you’re not gonna meet a lot of girls. Either you’re gonna meet one or two really high quality ones and that’s it, right?

What was amazing, though, was that there was this place called University of North Carolina. UNC at Chapel Hill, like, the Tar Heels. If you play college basketball, they’re one of the iconic college basketball schools along with Kentucky and Duke. They were ten minutes down the road, and because it’s a state school – it’s a great school, one of the top five state schools in the country – but they have these weird admittance regulations where, basically, if you are in the top 10% of your class in the state of North Carolina, then UNC has to take you. North Carolina’s a pretty bumpkiny state, and I guess most of the people who do well in high school are girls, because UNC has a real problem with admitting guys. They can’t admit enough guys! Actually, most colleges are getting like this, but UNC was one of the first because of the way the rules were somehow situated in the state of North Carolina. When I was there – and you can look this up, I think it’s still like this, it was 65% girl, 35% guy. In fact, the year that I started at Duke was the worst ratio ever for guy-to-girl. I think it was 68/32, and the year after it was like 65…So, I mean, it was all mid-60s and mid-30s when I was there, so basically, every girl on campus, even the really hot ones, had to compete for guys, and then what that caused was a total shift in the way UNC guys acted. They all thought that they could basically do no work and be fucking slovenly, fopished-haired, southern frat boy douches and still get laid, and they did! So, when we showed up to bars on Franklin Street as, like, Duke law students, we were like fucking kings. It was amazing. My world fucking changed. Listen, by the time I had graduated college, I think I had slept with somewhere between…I don’t know. No more than forty women, probably more than twenty, so let’s just call it thirty. And I was somewhere between five and ten in high school, probably six or seven, right? So, I’d hooked up with maybe twenty girls or so, twenty-five or something like that, in college. And most of those were, like, girls in the summers, man. Like, I’d be working in Miami in my dad’s restaurants in south Florida and I’d sleep with, like, ten girls in the summer, then I’d come back to Chicago and be like, “Oh, there’s a cute Indian girl I can hook up with.” Like, that’s it, right? It was fucking terrible, ‘cause I didn’t have any money in college and so – “Chicago is a big city!” No. University of Chicago’s ten miles south of the city. It was terrible.

So, I get to Duke and it was, like, oh, my god. In high school and in college, I had to learn, because there were no girls around and it was mostly guys. I went to boarding school, too. More guys than girls. So, everywhere I went, I had to learn how to deal with women, I had to learn how to compete with men. I had to struggle to get girls. And then I got to UNC and it was like a wolf in a fucking petting zoo. Way more girls than guys, and the guys sucked! It was incredible! It was like…the first couple nights I went out in Chapel Hill, I actually didn’t do well because I was so used to having to compete. The girls took my behavior as desperation, and then I realized, “Oh!” Like, I would have a girl locked up and then I would keep trying to pick her up, and she’d be like, “What is going on? What’s wrong with this guy? I don’t know.” She would read my effort as desperation, because I was so used to having to work hard. Once I learned that I could turn it down a little bit, it was like…dude, I fucked my way through so many sororities there. It was amazing. Guys, I cannot emphasize this enough. Mating markets, especially when you’re young – local sex ratio, meaning the sex ratio of the girls in the room or in your organization or in your school – is possibly the most important predictor of your mating success when you are in college, correct?

Geoff:
Yeah. Absolutely. So, choosing the right university and then, at the micro-level, choosing things like which dorm and which classes to take. So, I ended up taking a lot of psychology classes. Why? Because 70% women. A lot of history of art classes. And I was genuinely interested in, like, art history, but also kind of unconsciously I realized, oh, it’s 80% women. Then, other classes just didn’t quite grip me, like organic chemistry and in retrospect, oh. It’s ‘cause it’s, like, 80% guys. So, it’s fine to choose based on sex ratio and what kind of women are there and if there’s a class you’re interested in, you show up the first day and you’re not interested in any of the girls who show up, it’s okay to drop the class. Don’t feel shame and guilt and weird about that. It’s a mating market. It’s not just an educational experience, and that’s fine.

Tucker:
I’ll tell you something I didn’t do in law school. We were allowed to take two classes at UNC. Duke and UNC had this sort of transfer thing where you could take two classes and get credit, and I took one, the first one, like an idiot, I took a class in UNC Law School. I don’t know why I wasted my time with that. Then, I wised up, and then I took a class at the early education grad school, so I took, basically, a class for people who wanted to be teachers. 98% girls. It was 100-person class and there were two dudes and me. So, I guess 97%, and one of the guys was gay. It was so amazing. I think I hooked up with, legitimately, nine girls in that class. It was amazing.

Geoff:
Yeah. If you want to take Statistics, take Stats in the school of education. Right? Where it’s 80% women and not, like, the math department. If you want to take an Anatomy class, school of nursing.

Tucker:
Yes. Chicago didn’t have a nursing school, but yeah.

Geoff:
So, just broaden your horizons. Another thing is, one thing I had in college was kind of tunnel vision where I thought it’s really only legitimate for me to date college girls at my college, and I basically ignored all the women who worked at the college as secretaries, administrators, service workers, right? And realize, if there’s a 22-, 24-year-old woman who’s single who’s working at a university in one of those positions, she’s making less money than she would in the corporate sector. Why is she in that job? She chose that job partly because it’s cool, it’s a university, and she can meet university men, right?

Tucker:
I hooked up with an Aramark girl. I did. I swear to god. You know Aramark, right, Jason? Yeah. I hooked up with a girl who worked at Aramark at University of Chicago, yeah. She was actually really hot. She was this really hot Hispanic girl. She was going to Harold Washington Community College and working at U of Chicago, and I remember I treated her like a fucking person. All of these fucking snobs and idiots at U of Chicago thought they were smart. “Oh, if you work at Aramark, you’re an idiot, right?” I saw her. She was really, really pretty, and I remember, she was working the pizza thing or whatever, and I was like, “Hey, what’s up? Do you go to school here?” She was like, “No. I go to Harold Washington College.” I’m like, “That’s cool. It must suck to have to deal with all these fucking snobs and brats who think they’re better than you,” and her fucking eyes lit up. She looks at me and she’s like, “These fucking kids think they’re so—“ whatever. So, then, I saw her walking. We talked then, and it wasn’t even trying to scam on her. She was pretty. I wanted to hook up with her, but I wasn’t, like, I didn’t follow her around all day. Then, the next day or two days later, I was studying or I had nothing to do, so I basically hung out in the lobby of my dorm. I could see the Aramark workers leaving. When she was leaving, I walked out with her. I was like, “Oh, I’ve got to go to the gym,” whatever. So, I walk with her and then I was like, “Oh, let’s go do something tonight,” and we hooked up for a month. She was fucking great. She was amazing in bed. She was so cool. Look around!

Geoff:
I also had tunnel vision about age. Like, when I was a senior doing a lot of work in the psych department research labs, I thought of the female PhD students who are literally only a year or two older than me as somehow a completely different category of human. Like, a different species. But, there’s almost nobody as sexually frustrated and desperate as a female PhD student in a field that’s kind of female-dominated, where there aren’t enough guys around.

Tucker:
Unpack that, because they work so much. So hard.

Geoff:
They’re smart, under-appreciated intellectually, and if you can talk intelligently with them about their research and you care and you treat them like a person, it’s great.

Tucker:
Well, that’s attractive for any man!

Geoff:
Yeah.

Tucker:
That’s attractive for any man. That’s not just…Right, you’re saying open your eyes and look at the women around you and see which ones you have something in common with, you like, whatever. Don’t just think about “How do I scam on this sorority girl?” You know?

Geoff:
Yes. Exactly.

Tucker:
I think we covered that pretty well. Let’s talk about some of the things that we fucked up in college, because here’s what I want to be very clear about with you guys. You will fuck up incessantly with women in college. Just like we kinda talked about this in high school, you will fuck up incessantly with women in high school, I fucked up so much with women in high school that it was like, I remember, there was a time in high school where I was like, “Man, I better get this together soon or I’m not gonna…whatever.” And then I got to college. I probably fucked up more than I succeeded. That’s just the way it goes, but that’s how you learn. The path to success in any endeavor – entrepreneurship, sports, women, whatever – is littered with failures. So, I know I’ve got a million ridiculous failure stories. I know you’ve got a couple of good ones, Dr. Miller.

Geoff:
Oh, yeah.

Tucker:
You go first, ‘cause yours are gonna be funnier than mine.

Geoff:
Okay. One piece of advice is if a woman has deeply held religious convictions, like there was a really cute Mormon girl in a dorm, like a shared suite situation where it’s like, we’re sharing a kitchen, and I would try to argue her into Atheism and then into bed. Right? And she was clearly at Columbia, basically, to try to convert sinners and find a husband.

Tucker:
Right. You! You’re the sinner!

Geoff:
Yeah. So, she was trying to convert me to Mormonism. I was trying to convert her to Atheism, and that didn’t work.

Tucker:
Just real quick. Guys. Mormon girls. There’s two ways to deal with them. Either don’t waste your time ‘cause they’re not gonna fuck you unless they marry you, or they’re gonna fuck you really secretly and you can be the naughty guy on the side that no one knows about ‘cause you’re not Mormon. Because you’re not Mormon, generally speaking, unless you’re good at playing that game…You can be nice to them, be friends with them, but Mormon girls are not gonna fuck you. Don’t waste your time.

Geoff:
Another not entirely successful strategy. There was a really beautiful, really smart girl who was visiting Columbia from Harvard. In fact, we might even try to get her on the show ‘cause she’s now a psychoanalyst in Austin. I was so into her.

Tucker:
This is one of your exes, right?

Geoff:
Yeah. We were taking Neuroscience class together, and my first approach to her was at the lunchtime cafeteria. It was basically going up to her and bragging about, “I got a 97 on the midterm exam in Neuroscience.”

Tucker:
Well, in college that’s okay. Immediately, that sounds lame to everyone else. That’s not immediately lame in college. Like, you can talk about grades sometimes to some people.

Geoff:
It was pretty lame to her.

Tucker:
I’m sure it was. I was trying to save you there, dude.

Geoff:
Yeah. She basically didn’t talk to me for another three weeks, and eventually, I fixed it. But I didn’t understand the difference between signaling intelligence in a way that’s naturally, romantically attractive, like through humor vs. just bragging about your grades. You have to do one now because I’m feeling…

Tucker:
So, wait. You didn’t even ask her about her grades? You just went up to her and said, “Hey, how are you? I got a 97 on the midterm. Want to have sex?”

Geoff:
Well, no. I asked her and she was like, she only got a 91 and so she was all—

Tucker:
Oh, and then you were like, “Oh, I got a 97.”

Geoff:
Yeah.

Tucker:
Why don’t you just wag your genitals at her? That’s awesome. Dude, I’ve done way worse stuff, though. I’m just breaking your balls. God, what are some of the stupid things I did in college? There’s so many, it’s hard to actually…I’ve tried to flush most of them out of my mind. Like, it’s funny, my books…If you actually read my books, very few of the stories in there are from college. There’s only two or three, and most of them, I think, are from summers, not actually from college, because most of my college stories are either really lame and tedious or just pathetic, but not funny pathetic. Like, I write a lot of stories where I’m the one kind of getting shit on or puked on in my books, but those are funny. There weren’t a lot of funny stories in college. For the most part, I was just really fucking lame. Okay. Well, mistake number one. The girl I dated…I had a long-distance girlfriend most of boarding school and then my first year of college. That was for two reasons. One is because I have emotional attachment issues that were very evident at that point in my life that I had no idea about it, but that’s whatever. All 18-year-old guys have some issues. But mostly because she was really fucking hot. I mean, this girl….god, she was hot. And she was sort of religious. I think we dated in high school…Of course, since this was long distance, I was fucking other girls on the side, which is awful and abysmal, but I was a high school/college kid, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen. I was a monster, basically, like most guys. So, it didn’t even occur to me that this was cheating. It was like, oh, I’m sleeping with this girl and this is my girlfriend and they’re kind of separate things. And then, oh, wait. I didn’t realize until I got older how preposterous that was. Having a long-distance girlfriend was a huge disaster, and basically led me to all kinds of awful situations and that was a massive mistake. The only reason I kept dating her is because she was so hot and at a boarding school and college, she was hotter than any other girls ever. So, it was funny. I’d be, like, banging this girl or that girl and she would come up. She went to Vanderbilt, which is basically a school full of ridiculous hot girls. She was one of the hotter ones there. I went to visit her one weekend, and I was like, “Man, I’ve got one of the hottest girls at a hot girl school! I’m doing alright!” And then she came up to visit me, and it was funny. It was like, one of my best friends, Laura – she’s been my friend for years. She was one of my friends in college. She was like, “Yeah, Tucker, I’ve never seen anyone fundamentally alter an entire perception of them more than you did bringing that girl to this school.” Because it was like, the first month or two months, I slept with this girl at my dorm and this and that, but like all 18-year-old freshmen, I was like…kind of a goofy doofus. Whatever. And then I show up with this girl who’s drop-dead gorgeous, and every dude at the school is like, “What the fuck is going on? Where did you get her?” And it’s funny, after that, there were a bunch of fraternities that tried to rush me on campus, going, “This guy must be awesome if he’s fucking this girl, right?” I was like, I’m not joining your frat, sorry. The frats in Chicago were lame. But then also, a bunch of the girls were like, “Oh, he must have something going on or whatever.”

Geoff:
I think my worst dates were honestly the movie dates. ‘Cause I had no concept of…a) a movie date’s not a good way to meet a girl, ‘cause you can’t talk during the movie, and b) I had such pretentious taste in movies and such bad calibration.

Tucker:
Like, you were taking them to, like, Kurosawa movies or something?

Geoff:
Well, yeah. So, a freshman girl. I’m like, “This is great. I’ve just arrived in New York. I’m from Ohio. Let’s do something edgy. Let’s go see a midnight showing of Caligula!” Right? The movie by Bob Guccione, the Penthouse editor that’s just, like, crazy sex and violence. I took this girl and she walked out after an hour and I took her home and she spent literally the rest of the night throwing up in disgust at this movie.

Tucker:
Right, ‘cause that’s, like, people eating shit and stuff. That’s terrible. Right.

Geoff:
So, that didn’t work. The Andrei Tarkovsky Russian existential film festival, that did not work. Taking the visiting ex-high school girlfriend to David Lynch’s Blue Velvet, which is about, like, sociopathic sexual violence. But worst of all, the girl in the German Philosophy class. I was like, “This is great. She seems like a serious intellectual, Jewish girl.” There is this remastered version of Hans Syberberg’s classic movie Hitler: Our Man from Germany. Let’s go see that. Little did I realize, this is a movie that was a Hitler biopic, but with no live actors, done entirely with marionettes, and it was eight hours long. So, we’re kind of sitting through…

Tucker:
You took a girl to an eight hour long movie.

Geoff:
An eight hour long Hitler biopic with marionettes.

Tucker:
I can’t even…I don’t know how to process that. That’s so out of the realm of what…

Geoff:
She didn’t know how to process it, either.

Tucker:
At what point did you leave? God, tell me you didn’t sit through the whole thing.

Geoff:
She left after five hours, so bless her heart—

Tucker:
FIVE HOURS?!

Geoff:
She must have been so into me. Yeah. Five hours, we sat through that. We even stayed through the hour-long intermission after hour four. So, guys, movie dates suck.

Tucker:
Wait, there was an intermission and you didn’t say, “Hey, you know what? I’m really sorry about this. I had no idea. Let’s go get some ice cream and fuck or something.”

Geoff:
No! We were like, “We have to go have lunch and then come back.”

Tucker:
Oh, my god. Oh, my god. I feel bad because this actually, I think, is very emblematic of the differences between us. I have problems remembering. Dude, I fucked up so much in college. Nothing like that, but my versions of those things. I have real problems remembering them. Not because I’m embarrassed. I just don’t…I’m like an NFL Cornerback. No play. I only remember the interceptions, that I return for touchdowns. I never remember the times I get beat for touchdowns, even though it happens all the time. I just don’t even think about it, not because I’m embarrassed. I’m not pushing it out of my mind. Like, if someone remembered it brought it up, like, “Oh, yeah, I remember that.” Like, I’m not in denial. I just can’t…God, I’m trying to think. Alright. Everyone I think of is like the story I just told where it’s like, “That’s not really that embarrassing, dude. You had a hot girlfriend.” Like, having a long-distance girlfriend is stupid. It’s not really embarrassing. It’s just stupid. I don’t know.

There are so many times I can think of in college where…Alright, here’s a couple. So, there was this one Korean girl in my school who just…lived or died for me, and not because of anything about me. She was just into me. I had done nothing right. Just sometimes, you’re gonna come across – and she wasn’t all that hot. She was pretty mediocre, but she was all about me, which of course, made me like her less because I’m a stupid 20-year-old, right? Here I am, going out every night trying to pick up college girls or trying to sleep with college girls I knew, and here’s this girl who wants nothing more than to have sex with me all the time, everyday, and I pay no attention to her. That’s fucking retarded. But whatever. So, we go to the Belgian Halloween Party, which is like a big event at the University of Chicago, and get super fucking drunk. I mean, Belgian beer, right, it’s 90% alcohol. I’m, like, 19-year-old. I have no idea and I drink fifteen of them. So, this girl basically drags me back to my dorm. She’s, like, all but raping me. This is a situation where I’m actually way more drunk than she is. I don’t even remember…She brings me back to her dorm, and she takes my pants off and starts trying to blow me, and it’s like…then she kind of climbs on top of me, and it’s like, I don’t even remember if I was hard or not. I honestly don’t. I just remember this. I remember looking at her and she, like, kind of looked at me and stopped and leaned down to kiss me, like, “Isn’t this romantic?” But I was like, “No, no, no,” and I pushed her off of me and then basically fell off the bed, fell on top of her, and then just ran across her body to get to the bathroom. I booted. I basically repainted my bathroom with Belgian beer vomit. So, I threw up so much and she was, like, really nice. Stayed there for an hour or two, but eventually, I don’t know. I think I was blowing bubbles in the toilet water of, like, vomit. I wasn’t gonna die, but it was one of the dark nights of my life alcohol-wise, and she’s like, “Okay. I’m gonna leave, and I’ll see you again on maybe Tuesday after never.” This girl never wanted to talk to me again, never wanted to deal with me again, and it’s like, on one hand I didn’t care because she wasn’t really all that good looking, but she was not ugly. She was just whatever, mediocre. On the other hand, this school did not have a lot of girls, even mediocre ones, and not a lot of them wanted to sleep with me, and this girl would have fucked me three times a day and not cared about anything else that happened in my life. So fucking stupid. I made her basically work for three weeks to get me and then I threw up all over the place. I couldn’t even finish. And then she, of course, told a bunch of girls. Oh, god, it was kind of a pain in the ass, because the other girls were like, “Oh, I heard about you. You’re the one who threw up all over Lori Kim.” I was like, oh. Well, thanks. Yes, that would be me.

Geoff:
I mean, there will be women who are just really into you, and it’s important not to treat them like garbage in college, ‘cause a lot of college guys….

Tucker:
It only hurts you.

Geoff:
It’s not just the peak of, like, guys murdering each other and going to war, but it’s also kind of the peak of guys acting like sociopaths, and it’s really not a high point of male conscience. So, if you’re with a girl, particularly if it’s, like, freshman orientation week and you have sex with her and she’s bleeding afterwards, she’s not going to admit, “Oh, I was a virgin and you were my first guy.” She probably is and treat her gently and tenderly and respectfully, ‘cause…

Tucker:
That happened to me twice. Neither of them told me. You’re totally right.

Geoff:
Right. They won’t tell you. ‘Cause they think it’s not cool.

Tucker:
They didn’t tell me. I had to find out from their friends both times! Both times I found out from their friends. That happened with an Indian girl and an Asian girl. Like, FOB Indian and Asian, not, like, American, they’re American. Yeah. That happened twice.

Geoff:
Yeah. And there are other women who are just gonna be into you and kind of follow you around like a lapdog. Don’t treat them shitty. You will feel bad about it kind of the rest of your life if you have a conscience.

Tucker:
At some point. I didn’t feel bad about it for a while, and it was a few years later that I was like, man. That was stupid. But, even if you don’t have much of a conscience at eighteen, nineteen, twenty, which a lot of guys don’t – literally, biologically, neurologically, they don’t; it doesn’t excuse you, I’m just saying that’s why – it only hurts you. There is no upside. There is no, no, no upside. We talked about this over and over. If you can be the guy that girls sleep with and no one knows, you’re gonna be a guy that more women sleep with. If you’re the guy that you fuck a girl and tell everyone in your dorm, you’re basically advertising to every other woman that everyone’s gonna know if you sleep with her, and she’s probably not gonna be into that.

Geoff:
Yeah. She’s like, “Oh, he’s the guy who will ruin my sexual reputation on this campus forever.” Is that attractive? No.

Tucker:
No, it is not. Alright, so now that I think about it, the only reason that I even got laid in college is because I went out a lot. I actually did have a lot of fun and I was basically – I went to a nerd school, and so almost by default, I was, like, high status or attractive because I could have a conversation. I knew about things outside of Organic Chemistry and Calculus and fucking Claude Lévi-Strauss. We would throw these parties, like the Ditka, like I was telling you about. I acted like…if I had gone to a cool school, like the University of Virginia or Georgia or Florida, I probably would’ve been just another fucking doofus. My status would’ve been because I was smart, not because I was cool. Chicago, I was very smart, but I was no smarter than any number of other people there, but I just wasn’t socially retarded. That’s really the only reason I got girls at all, and I tried a lot because I was basically a walking erect penis. That was basically it. And, I’ll tell you what, the other thing I did that was smart. I realized the unexploited niche in my school was Asian and Indian girls. Actually, I didn’t really realize it. It was like, those were the hot girls. There were, like, three hot white girls at this school. One was in my dorm. I hooked up with her for, like, the first two weeks. She went on to – by the way, she’s a Rhodes Scholar. She might end up winning a Nobel Prize. Like, she’s incredible. She’s a hot woman in Chemistry who does amazing, amazing work. People in Chemistry probably know who I’m talking about. There’s another one I hooked up with in my dorm, and she actually was a Rhodes Scholar, too! There were two Rhodes Scholars. One was in my dorm. One was in another house on my same dorm. Two Rhodes Scholars came into my school, with me, and the two houses in the same dorm. I hooked up with both of them. Hey, I wasn’t a Rhodes Scholar. Then, there was another one that had a boyfriend or thought I was repulsive or whatever. For some reason, didn’t want to sleep with me. Probably legitimate reason. But at my school, there were a bunch of Asian/Indian girls, either American or fresh off the boat, and there were a lot of them that were attractive. Asian girls can be hot. Indian girls can be hot. I was like, alright. I made good friends with one of them, joined the South Asian Student Association, and I was, like, the white dude in it. I didn’t try to pretend. I was like, “Oh, yeah!” I had fun, I danced with them, I did all the stupid shit. I would stay up with them for….what’s the Muslim thing? Ramadan. Right? Some of them, like, oh yeah. It was cool. Like, these girls would be cooking for me, right? And then I’d fuck two of their friends. Maybe not that night, but later on. I just went out and had fun and did all these cool things and I probably failed more than I succeeded, but I just didn’t care. I was like, “Alright, whatever. That girl doesn’t like me. No big deal.”

Geoff:
Yeah. It’s a time to experiment, so don’t have tunnel vision about, “Oh, I have to date just the college girls and not the secretaries.” Don’t have tunnel vision about age. You’re allowed to date grad students if they’re into you. And don’t have tunnel vision about ethnicity, either. I had the same thing in college. Like, there were all these Jewish girls who I got along with really well. I’m not Jewish, but the Jewish guys at Columbia were all chasing the blonde Midwestern girls who all seemed new and exciting to them, leaving the Jewish girls neglected. The Jewish girls were really into guys who were smart, and I was kind of smart, and that just worked. If I had preconceptions, like, “Well, I’m kind of white Anglo-Saxon Protestant Midwesterner and I should stick to my people,” that would’ve been just stupid. So, broaden your horizons.

Tucker:
Not only is it pretty racist, which is ridiculous to begin with, but listen. There’s nothing wrong with not finding a certain type of person attractive or finding a certain type attractive. That’s fine, right? But it’s one of those things where it’s like, understand that what you experience in high school is probably a small slice of what’s available. You know? And what’s out there. Like, not to sound like I’m some goofy multiculturalist. I actually learned a shitload from the Asian/Indian girls I dated not just about other cultures, but about other foods, other ways of looking at the world. I really did. That’s not one of these goofy NBC after school special things. Like, I really did learn a lot. Dude, I didn’t realize what a clitorectomy was. I hooked up with a couple of Indian girls who had clitorectomies. I was like, “This is awful. This is barbaric.” I couldn’t believe…I remember one girl very specifically, she was in the house next to mine. We hooked up a couple times. It didn’t really work that way, but we were really good friends. And she’d had a clitorectomy and her parents visited. I was really pissed off. Like, I wanted to fight her dad. I was really upset. And she got mad at me. She was like, “Look. This isn’t your fucking fight. We’re not even dating. You need to mind your business.” On one hand, she has a point. On the other hand, how fucked up is this? That’s legitimate genital mutilation. And granted, I guess they didn’t do it with a piece of broken glass like awful sub-Saharan Africa, whatever, but it was like, there were a lot of things that I didn’t understand about women and about the world that I learned, basically because I was just looking to get laid. But, at the same time, I didn’t just treat girls like life support for vagina. You know? I interacted. Guys, you want to know how to get laid in college? Treat women like people. I hate to sound trite or like some ridiculous moralistic sex shamer, but not only do you have better sex, but most guys in college are not doing that. If you can do that, then you’re gonna be way more attractive.

Geoff:
And honestly, college is a great opportunity not just to learn from professors, but to learn from girlfriends. If you select girlfriends that have something to teach you…I was kind of oddly attracted to women who had the ability to kind of call me out on my shit and kind of tease me and see through my self-deceptions. There were three or four women who kind of taught me more about being a man in college than all the classes combined. They were challenging women, but I was kind of drawn to them because they made me raise my game as a guy, as a person. College is where you will meet those women. It’s a great opportunity, so don’t be afraid of girlfriends who kind of challenge you and make you grow, just like you shouldn’t be afraid of courses that challenge you.

Tucker:
Yeah. It’s kind of funny, guys. Here’s the bad news. So, the good news about college is if you pick the right school, you’re gonna find a lot of women who are very interested in meeting guys, sexual exploration, etc. Now remember, all the things we’ve told you before still apply. Make her feel physically safe. Make her feel emotionally safe. Make her feel socially safe. All those sorts of things still apply, but the most attractive thing about you is gonna be basically, I think, your social status, and it’s very easy to engineer good social status as long as you limit it to the domain you’re in in college. It’s really easy to engineer that. That’s the good news. The bad news is the second that you leave college, your value falls off a fucking cliff and the girls’ value goes through the roof. So, make sure you take advantage when you’re in college because when you leave, it’s not gonna be like that anymore for a little while. That’s what we’re gonna talk about in the next podcast.

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