When Nils and I started the Mating Grounds in 2013, we weren’t sure where it would go, or how it would develop. Each of us had other full time projects and jobs, and though we knew there was a demand for this, we had no idea how it would all play out.
In the ensuing 3 years, we’ve learned two things:
1. There was a huge demand for actionable, ethical, and effective information about how men can get into relationships with women. So we literally wrote the book on it.
2. None of us want to build or run a business around this topic.
It’s not that we don’t care about this subject and topic. We do care. A lot. Obviously, look at all the work we put in. We wrote the book that we wished had existed when we were teenagers to guide us through one of the hardest parts of being a man.
Not only that, we recorded 100+ episodes of our podcast. There’s really not much more we have to say, at least generally, on the topic.
And to show you how actionable and meaningful all the advice was, we even spent a FULL YEAR helping the most broken ginger we could find get his shit together. And it worked–he’s doing amazing.
We could do another guy the same way…but it’s just not there for us. It’s not a compelling drive anymore.
Nils wants to spend his time ghostwriting books, punching up scripts and developing TV projects in Hollywood.
Yes, we could turn this into a business, probably a big one. But the reality is, it would basically boil down to us doing a TON of repeating ourselves and teaching the same things over and over and well…that would be boring as hell to us.
We are past this point in our lives. We wrote all of this down and did the podcasts because we wanted this information to exist and be out there, but at some point, there’s not much else to say, and we’ve said just about all of it.
We’ve moved on. The answers you need are all right there, in the book and in the podcast episodes. You just have to do the work.
For us, we are moving on to other parts of our life. But for someone else, there might be something here.
We made pretty much all of our information free, and what isn’t free is damn near free (the book is like, $15 I think), so the business is not selling information. And it’s also not selling courses (which is another way to sell information), or the fucking worst, all of those bullshit bootcamps that all of the scammers run (which is also selling information).
That doesn’t mean there isn’t a big business here, a business that is valuable and life-enriching for a lot of guys.
There is a totally different way to turn this into a business: by providing all the services that guys need to make themselves better. Instead of selling information, you can give the information away for free, and sell the help in implementing it–sort of like coaching, but better. Scalable and actually effective.
-specific and actionable feedback on behavior, body language, attitude, etc
-clothes consultations and fashion assistance
-specific coaching and counseling on conversation, etc
-help with any other number of improvements that guys need to make that we talk about in the book or podcast
I’ll give you one very awesome idea, and you’re welcome to run with it. This is just spitballing, so please don’t hold me to specifics, but think about the general model:
What if guys paid like $50, and for that, real women gave them feedback on everything about them.
Not in a judgmental, mean way. You know as well as I do that you can look at someone’s Instagram account, Facebook page, and like, a one minute video of them talking and get a REAL good picture of who they are.
Well, what if guys could submit all of those accounts, and record a video, and then maybe 3 different women scored and rated them on objective criteria, and gave them real feedback.
I would make it so the women were giving the feedback anonymously, not directly to the guy. And I would make it so that the guy doesn’t know the women, of course.
Then, based on the women’s objective scores, the guys could get information and be offered specific coaching based that could improve their bad areas. Also, it could help them understand what they are doing right, and lean into the good areas.
That’s just one idea. There are plenty more, probably better ones.
The point is, the businesses here are not about selling information, they are about helping men understand what’s not working, so they can fix it, and get the relationships they want with the women they want. So people can connect with each other.
Solve for that, and you’ll get rich, and you’ll deserve every dollar, because you’ll be making people’s lives actually better.