5th of October 2014

Success Stories #8: Increased confidence and bouncing back from divorce

This is a great success story. This guy turned a bad situation into a good one. He used our advice to realize what positive traits he had to offer, fixed his negative traits and improved his confidence, and is now dating an amazing woman. This guy is the perfect example of what following our advice can do.

Dear Mr. Max and Dr. Miller,

I am a recently divorced 27 year old dumped back into the market. I had never dated much prior to marriage (married my first girl-friend) and had a completely warped perspective on everything sex and dating. Your podcasts, coupled with lots of reading on the subject of evolutionary mate selection, open my mind to facts that had been staring me in the face for years. For example, my biggest hangup was I was obsessed with my physical appearance because I thought it was really the only important thing in attraction (which is fucking stupid because I do not think that way outside of dating).

As a divorcee I was lost, and unsure of how to move forward. Yet, as I listened and read I was struck with how many positive traits I actually had. I am a great conversationist, men or women. I had been overweight in college but worked hard in recent years to become fit. I am intelligent, humorous, ambitious and well dressed. I had everything but was damaged by divorce and hangups from my extremist religious childhood. Your podcast woke me up that I was a highly attractive potential mate when I did not even see it in myself.

Because I own a sustainable farm and live in a really terrible mating market, I hit up OkCupid, set up a profile, engaged women intelligently and looked for somebody I really wanted to be around. Low and behold five days later (and 20,000 words of exchanged messages) I went on the first date. It was clear she was attracted to me before we met and the date was just to confirm (for her and me to feel safe) our mutual attraction. Its been 1 month and I am now dating a beautiful, intelligent, ambitious, independent women (She was tired of bad and pathetic men). The time we spend together, and the sex, is simply amazing because we feel so confident and comfortable with each-other.

Perhaps even more interesting than my success is that your project allowed me to look back on my life and realize how unattractive I must have been to my wife. I got stressed out with work, acted depressed often, was overly needy, felt guilty of my sexual urges,(thanks to religion) and was an over-all shitty boyfriend and husband. Although I was very loyal, I completely understand now why she cheated on me which terminated our marriage.

Your project took skills and understanding I had gained in other domains of life and let me apply them to dating, and I am a much better person and boyfriend because of it.

Thank You

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